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| Picture source: WeHeartIt |
I'm going to keep this short and as sweet as I can be with regard to this topic. I spend a lot of time on social media and have seen waves of discourse surrounding the concept of 'bisexual lesbians' dying down quicker than the way in which they're brought up, but the dying down hasn't been so occurrent recently. People are genuinely advocating for the fair use of the label 'bisexual lesbian' and that is absolutely baffling to me. Also, before people start slating this article for being invalidating or rude, I am simply a somewhat frustrated lesbian saying my piece. Go start a thread or something about me, knock yourself out.
Bisexuality and lesbianism are almost oxymoronic in both their sentiment and definitions alone, and it's genuinely bewildering to me that people are trying to twist this. Lesbians are female or female-aligned people that are romantically and sexually attracted to female or female-aligned people. I'm also not gatekeeping in saying that - it's literally the definition of the word. Bisexuality is used by people that are attracted to two or more genders, and correct me if I'm wrong, but by elimination does that not make them attracted to genders outside of female alignment? These sole definitions disprove the concept of bisexual lesbians alone as the two fields of attraction cannot entirely overlap, but I can guarantee that someone will shoot me down in saying that, so let me just express what I mean a little bit more.
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| Picture source: Atypical |
Sexual and romantic attraction are different things, right? People compartmentalise different realms of attraction and give each respective part a different label - for example, 'homoromantic asexual'. In applying solely this logic to the concept of bisexual lesbians, I can somewhat understand why people advocate for the universal validity of this term. You know, attracted sexually to more than one gender but romantically to only female-aligned people? Granted, this makes a level of sense but this logic isn't infallible.
This train of thought implies that the term 'lesbian' applies to romantic attraction only, as the 'bisexual' element (you guessed it) refers to sexual attraction leaving a space for a romantic attraction label, which frankly isn't the case. 'Bisexual homoromantic' would be more logically applicable in this case, as the term 'lesbian' encompasses all aspects of same-sex, female-aligned attraction. It's invalidating to both lesbians and bisexual folk to claim that these sexual orientations overlap, as there is an implication that people that identify as lesbians can be attracted to men - and that is where the frustration stems. Not all sexualities have to have some kind of link to men... Why is that even a debate?
I said I'd keep it short, and I'm reluctant to even post this because I'm sure I'll get some kind of backlash, but I feel like I needed to have a quick vent. Of course, labels are subjective to an extent and should be used by whoever feels comfortable using them to an extent. I'm not trying to sit here and invalidate you through a screen. While I wholeheartedly support all queer folk and have undying respect for you, as a fellow LGBTQ+ human myself, I retain the right to critique and debate what's going on in our community. And personally, I find the entire concept of bisexual lesbians to be both invalidating and agitating.
If you want to have a chat with me about this subject or share your views, feel free to shoot me a message. I'm available on all of the links on my profile page (linked below).
Article by: PJ
